release.

You don't know what you've done to me

and you don't even care.

Actually, you probably do know.

and you still dont care. 

The Lord lets you be intimately involved 

in the lives of those you are around.

But you only care about yourself and what you know.

You don't have the integrity to back this up.

It almost makes me want to pray 

that God takes that gift away

Because without integrity and care, 

you only hurt people.

and i'm not the only one. 

but once again I'm sure you know that too.

not that you care.

as long as you dont get hurt anymore right?

I know you know whats right

Yet you still choose to do wrong.

Didn't you learn?

That is the definition of a fool.

 

Thats one of those things

you did need to be teachable on

and you know it.

Sometimes I say a thing or two 

just to see if you take any interest at all

But all you give me is a "hey, I'm good"

and "cool."

You could at least say you don't want to talk to me.

I never did anything to you 

and  you know it.

Sure I probably shouldn't have let this bottle up, 

but I did. 

And you know why?

Because what I really wanted

is for you to talk to me

But obviously thats not gonna happen.

I don't even know

that I could believe an apology

at this point.

But something in me 

still wants one.

I thought you could get excited

for me when I do stuff for the Kingdom 

knowing that you were a voice

that helped make it happen. 

and I could have the security 

of you sending me out. 

Looks like you were wrong. 

and so was I. 

But thats ok. 

There is no void there

The Lord has provided 

that and so much more.

I don't need you anymore.

at all.

but too bad that doesn't take away 

the pain.

I defended you

time after time after time after time

more than you know.

I walked thru so much dirt just to keep you out of it

because i believed in you

and you know what? 

way deep down

I still do.

You can't continue like this.

obviously. 

we all see that. including you.

but i believe in what you can be... later on.

if you choose it.

or even now.

o well 

the ball is in your court.

but for now I must do this for me. 

I forgive you.

and you won't slow me down. 

Bye.