strategy.

To the Remnant of the Remnant-  You are those who are seeking God with everything in you. You're submitting to both the call of God on your life and the authority God has placed around you. You are aligning with His heart, seeking to look and sound like Him more every moment of every day. Your face is set like flint on His face and you're consistently finding new ways to walk closer to your King. You are discovering Papa's heart for His people and praying in the revival that He desires. You are taking the time to dream with Him and are saying "YES" to all He is showing you. You don't care how high the cost is because you are overwhelmed with the presence and the unfailing love of your Lover. He's good and He's worth it. Every time that any ounce of doubt tries to tell you otherwise, you choose to remember. You remember His goodness and His absolute faithfulness in every circumstance and then there you are- once again left undone by your glorious savior.

Sound familiar? Then I'm talking to you.

We're in a season where God's people are rising up to the call of transformation and reformation. We've spent the last several seasons preparing, simplifying and aligning our lives. Now cultural reformation is looking absolutely possible and even tangible. Seeing families, churches, schools, and even entire cities turn to God is no longer just a good idea. Instead, for many of you, Papa God's dreams are becoming your reality. You've allowed yourself to be consumed with His call, and He's gracing you with strategy and constant confirmation.

Now, that’s the beautiful side of things. On the other hand, we have an enemy who is absolutely outraged. The body of Christ has stepped up in prayer and devotion, and reformation is inevitable. The enemy is seeing the boldness that is sweeping over the Bride and he is in a panic.  I even see that his rage is outweighed by a sense of panic. The Bride is recognizing her beauty and her authority. A sound of worship is arising that reminds the enemy of the access to the throne that he no longer has. Just when he thought he had a hold on us, someone flipped to the back of The Holy Book and reminded him of His sure defeat and now we're walking in that victory. 

Since we have aligned ourselves to the heart of God, the enemy literally cannot find a foothold in our lives. There's no open door. 

All this makes sense to you so far, yet still there is something. It's like a weight or a heaviness. You don't know if it’s necessarily a bad thing, but it's not good thing either. It's almost like there is an anxiety present, but you can't seem to find the root of it. If you relate to this, let me suggest a solution that God has revealed over the last several days through a couple of mighty prophets: 

Go spray some paint, discern the clouds, and sleep well.

What? Spray paint, clouds and sleep? What in the world does any of that have to do with ANYTHING? Well. I'm glad you asked.

A friend of mine recently had a vision where she was walking among some dark, creepy trees. Suddenly, she saw a smudge. She then recognized that none of what she was seeing was even real. It was just a scene from an angered enemy who couldn't seem to find a foothold, so he painted a lie. I believe it's time we pull out a can of spray paint and cover over the enemy's evil scene. That darkness isn't even there; he just wants you to think it is! Hey and while you are spraying over the enemy's lies, why not dream with the Lord a little and paint prophetically the scene you want to see? Whether you paint these scenes in the natural or just in your imagination, the Lord LOVES it. He created us to dream with Him!

There's a common theme prophetically right now where the Lord is speaking to many about the cloud the size of the man's hand rising out of the sea (1 Kings 18:44).  It seems like everywhere I turn, someone else is talking about it. Be it healing, glory, salvation, signs and wonders, or all of the above, we just all seem to sense that something is coming. His promised rain is not far off. The Lord recently revealed to a friend, that the enemy has created a false cloud. The body of Christ has been crying out for the cloud that is bringing the rain. He's speaking to many about the cloud and promising His presence. His promises are always yes and amen, therefore when you feel a cloud around you, pay attention to it. Be careful to discern the clouds. The enemy wants you to pay attention to false weight. He wants you to convince yourself that something is wrong and distract you from the true cloud of God's rain. The word glory means weight- so weight can be a good thing. The weight of glory is pure, beautiful, and it compels you to do things that honor God. The false cloud, or weight, that the enemy has been trying to create, may look like rain or glory for a split second, but in reality, its only causing confusion, anxiety and unrest. Which leads me to the last one. Sleep.

One thing I've said of myself for years is that I am a good sleeper. When I choose to go to sleep, it's like I flip a little switch in my mind and I can be asleep pretty much immediately. If I wake up for any reason, it's not hard for me to go back to sleep. In the past few weeks I have spent many nights tossing and turning, waking up every hour. It frustrated me because I simply did not know why this was happening. I tried to figure out if it was some emotional or physical thing, something I needed to pray about or the devil or none of the above. I didn't really come to conclusions, I just woke up tired and frustrated the next day. A week or two into this little ordeal, the enemy's plans were exposed once again. The same friend who got the word about the false cloud got this word: Many of us have been sleeping too much, or too little. Some of us are sleeping through alarms when we have never done that before. Some of us are waking up every hour. Some of us are feeling tired all day. We, Remnant of the Remnant friends, are in a time where we are called to awaken people. We have received strategy and need energy and rest to carry it out. No wonder the enemy would try to rob us of rest! I know part of the reason that my nights were filled with unrest is because once I realized that I was waking up a lot, I would spend time racking my brain trying to figure out what was going on. Once this revelation was shared with me, my nights changed. Since then, I've still woken up a few times in the night, but each time I am able to fall back asleep much quicker and with a smile on my face because I'm excited that the enemy has been found out. So- do what you can to sleep well. And rest in the understanding that the resistance is the enemy's attempt at robbing us of our ability to awaken others.

So friends. That’s the strategy- spray paint, discern the clouds, and sleep well. 

2012 has been called a year of alignment and a year of prophetic order. God is positioning us for glory. He is cleansing our hearts and leading us into righteousness. We His children are rising up in faith and walking in a level of excitement, expectation, and joy that is shifting atmospheres. All you've dreamed of is accessible in the glory that is made available to us in this hour. Don't let the enemy distract you from it- he's just a liar. That's all. He's been found out, and will continue to be found out by listening prophets. Our victory is set. Let's do this thing. 

start.

It's after 3am and here I am with a sudden urge to write. I don't actually suppose sudden is the proper term, because it's been brewing for a while... Now. what to write about? Well, I suppose there is a wealth of things. I write a blog or two in my head a day I'd say. Or at least I begin one.

So. It's 2012. We're well into it. March is upon us and Spring is in the air. It has been quite the whirlwind for me. Lots of new things happening. New job, new friends, new church, new ministry, and the list goes on. School is kicking my butt. This senior is beyond ready to be DONE! December will be here before I know it- thank God for graduation.

I don't guess this blog has much purpose at this point, other than to quench my 3am urge. But, hey, maybe this will be the start to a new wave of blogs. or maybe not. you never know till you try and you gotta start somewhere huh?

waiting.

Typically the idea of waiting is full of negative emotions. Twenty first century culture demands everything RIGHT NOW. There is consistently a new upgrade for faster.... everything. From our instant communication via cell phones and internet to even the food we eat, there is a constant expectation that everything should be fast.

Have you ever clicked on a program on your computer and then because it didn't immediately appear, click it 20 more times just to have it open all 20 times a few seconds later?

It is so easy for us to get frustrated when we don't get what we want immediately. Think about the devices you have- cell phone, computer, internet- any of it. Now think back 10 years. Or even less than that. Remember how much SLOWER everything was? There is a constant acceleration of all those little things that are supposed to save time, yet our lives seem to get busier and busier.

So. You're seeking the Lord and He responds to you- not with a yes, not with a no, but a "WAIT." What is your reaction?

Do we even know how to wait anymore??

In recent days, the Lord has placed an expectation in the hearts of many of His followers for the coming age. There is a sense among a whole lot of believers right now that something is about to change. Some have hope of fulfilled dreams. Others don't know what to expect- it's just a sense that something is about to happen. But for now? We wait.

While our culture demands everything fast- we actually do have some sense of waiting. In all actuality, our "now" demands have set us up to have more expectant waiting than ever before. Years ago, you sent a letter to someone and you knew you had to wait for it to get to the person, then even once he or she responded, it had to go through the mail all over again to get back to you. Therefore, when you drop the letter in the mail, you may not even think about it again for a while. You might even forget about it. Now, if you shoot a message to someone through email, it's perfectly normal to receive something back even the same day. We've grown to expect it.

We expect a quick response from most everything these days. From microwaves, to the new annoying second-by-second mini news feed on facebook, everything is RIGHT NOW. While waiting for your food in the fast food line, what do you think about? You may sit and think about what you have to do later on or about that phone call you need to make, but all the while you sit there with an expectation that food is coming quickly. You may be thinking on other things, but you definitely haven't forgotten that you are about to have food. In fact, you may even find yourself getting frustrated if it takes a little longer than expected.

So I ask again.... When the Lord tells you to wait, how do you react? What do you do? What SHOULD you do?

Well. To be honest, I don't know.

Wait I guess?

No, but seriously. What does waiting look like? What is the "doing" in the "waiting"?

Well, heres what I know about waiting. When I wait, theres an expectancy for a certain result. As I wait, I am consistently thinking of that "expected end." I look forward with nervousness, frustration or excitement depending on the situation. Nervousness comes when I've got time to freak myself out about the results ahead- its that butterflies in the stomach feeling you get when you're about to give a speech or something. Frustration comes when I am simply sick of waiting- usually this is when I've got somewhere to be and somethings or someone is holding me up. Excitement in waiting is when I know something awesome is up ahead. Its when our usual reaction is, "I can't wait!"

When God says wait, why do I so often choose nervousness or frustration? Why is it that I've allowed culture to tell me waiting is negative? Why do I let myself get caught up in what I am supposed to DO in this moment?

Waiting is not about the doing, but instead, it's more a mindset. Its inserted hope. Its something we can expect.

Galatians 5:5 says, " For we through the Spirit, by faith, are waiting for the hope of righteousness."
So often, our faith is about waiting on the Lord. We expect right relationship with Him and do all we can by faith. He shows up without fail every time. What a faithful God we have!

So maybe we should start changing our view of waiting. Instead of dreading the process, and associating waiting with long doctors office visits or being stuck in traffic with some place to be, lets choose hope.

Waiting IS hope. If it's our faithful King whose saying it, we know there's an incredible end we can expect. When the Lord tells us to wait, He's doing something for our good and is promising us a good outcome.

Hope for it.

Expect it.

Wait on the Lord.

"But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."

Isaiah 40:31

dna.

Its absolutely amazing to me how much goes on inside of me when I do something as simple as watching a video like this:

(I have no rights to this video, I just like it. Visit globalfireministries.com for more info.)

Revival is in my DNA. I was born for it. I don't just hop from event to event because I want the next fix. No. Its who I am. Its who God has created me to be. Nothing brings me more joy, satisfaction, and giddy excitement than being in a room with leaders experiencing the glory of God. Its who I am. I am not afraid to say it, and I'm learning to embrace it more each day right now. Its so fun. And so difficult at times. But all the good outweighs the bad by FAR. It does not matter what each day brings- the cry of my heart will forever be, "Lord you're worth it."

His presence is what I long for. Glory. Those times where you gather in a service with people and you can hardly say a word. All you can really do is look to your neighbor and say, "whoa."

If ever I say that to you, its an expression of being overwhelmed, unsure of what exactly the Lord is doing, but completely confident of His deep, deep work that is changing my life in that very moment.

There's been several of these moments in my life, and they are what bring life to me. I'm done trying to justify my need for revival environment and I'm embracing it as who God has called me to be. In this season, I'm doing my best to keep my sails set and letting the breath of Holy Spirit guide me each day.

It's crazy and spontaneous, and a little frightening at times, but oh so worth it. His glory presence is surrounding me regularly. He's leading me to places and moments where I can be immersed in His glory.

This is a season of mandate. Its a time where I move in the authority that has been given to me by God alone. There is no doubt in my mind that its a season where I am stepping in and going to begin to see the fulfillment of my calling. Dreams I've carried deep inside for many years are unfolding before my eyes. I always wondered when this day would come. Its here. And I'm not afraid to move.

gust.

So. I just finished reading this blog by Clark Campbell about the tornado relief efforts in my precious city. In it, Clark sticks with the theme of
[a gust of wind in our sails.]
In a simple facebook message to him after reading it, I realized the magnitude of my own reflections on his reflections and thus- I blog.

First, even if you know me, and quite possibly even if you know me well, there's something most of you probably don't know. Here lately, I've been on an intense journey of what I have referred to as "learning to walk again." Within this season has been some of the deepest pain, disappointment, and loneliness I have ever felt. At the same time, its been growth, discovery, and hints of some of the greatest joy, peace, and glory I've ever known. Before this, was a crazier season. It was the negative emotions I mentioned on top of what felt like spiritual and even mental paralysis. In that season I had two separate worlds-
World #1 was in public; where I functioned mostly normal- seeking God, dreaming with people, and enjoying life. (Normal except for the times when the effects of world #2 eeked into world #1- some people could tell when this happened, many others were oblivious).
And then there was World #2. This was when I was alone. Torment, tears, anger, frustration and confusion were the norm. I ALWAYS knew World #1 was who I really am and it angered me beyond belief that this "other world" was even present.
Through prayer with a close friend several months ago in a time where World #2 was clearly eeking into World #1, what I always thought deep down became made known. World #2 that I dealt with for so long was not self-inflicted as I had grown to believe- instead, it was a deliberate attack from the enemy. Satan's tactics were exposed and my friend and I went to war- it was painful, ugly, nasty, and very real. However, the good thing is, because my God is a warrior, victory was inevitable.

Several months on the other side of the month-long war process, victory everyday still has to be something I choose. Learning to walk again, even when it feels like I'm on eggshells, is a process I'm committed to-not because I have some kind of crazy dogged determination, but rather because I have an astoundingly gracious and loving God who refuses to give up on me. I love how I heard it said recently by a wonderfully wise friend, "Every time I go to quit, this guy Jesus gets in the way."

Okay so that was not what I actually came over here to blog about... but whatever. I guess thats my backstory.

Here's what I meant to blog:

In the past couple days this phrase has come to my mind over and over again.

"Just keep moving."

Whether its God's voice, or Him simply bringing it to my mind, (and I am no longer afraid to say I don't know), I cannot deny His involvement. In reading Clark's blog I recognized that this little phrase has been "[a strategic gust of wind in my sails.]"

Keep in mind, less than an hour before I started reading the blog, I put up this FB status:

As I read about that initial journey of Clark, Jerry, and Lindsey I thought to myself, "what was I doing at that exact time?"

Then I realized... O. Right. I was sleeping in my cozy bed, in my intact house, with power.

So I asked myself, "okay, so what about once I woke up?"

I scrolled through old texts and facebook posts to try and remember. What I found and recalled was very sobering. Here was my day on Thursday, April 28, 2011:

It was the day off before finals at Lee. I slept in, probably late. I don't remember what I did right when I got up, but I'm sure it was not very productive...it was my day off right? I do remember later looking through facebook at pictures and statuses and having a true sense of pride for my community:

I was overwhelmed by how much Cleveland was fulfilling God's mandate to "be a hub of revival for the nations." (This quote is part of a prophecy given over this city way back in the 50's- and playing my role in seeing it come to pass, is what I've given my life to.)

Lets see... That was 1:38pm- after that, I can't remember what I did until several hours later when I was roaming around at Target. I came across a discounted phone cover that I purchased. While still at Target, I noticed a missed call on my phone. I realized then, that I had forgotten that I had told the Stone family I would come babysit! BAD, I know. I rushed over to their house and watched the beautiful kiddos for a while. End of Day.

Reading the blog and reflecting on what I did that day made me realize that while Clark, Jerry, Lindsey and all the many volunteers were assembling, I was chilling out at home, and then running around doing my selfish errands, with absolutely no sense of urgency or focus.

Hmmm... I really DO need that status I posted tonight to become reality in my life- and April 28th for me epitomized it!

Clark's prayer in his blog was this:

Well, his prayer was answered in me tonight. I did discover that their sails were set. I also discovered that mine weren't.

Sure, in the days following I did do some stuff with relief efforts, but what if everyone took a few days to realize the urgency of the need? What if Clark, Jerry and Lindsey hadn't set their sails? Or what if they had tried to come up with all this on their own? The fact is that yes, this movement WAS supernatural. God was at work supernaturally through focused, willing people. Nope, its not about these guys or any other volunteers, but they know that too, that's why God chose their sails to breath His wind upon.

So now, I set my sails.

Thanks Clark for writing out the story and for praying a simple prayer.

Thanks Jerry for saying yes- and all that that entails.

And thanks Lindsey for carrying a joy thats positioning you to shake nations.

My sails are set- Lets go.

no.

Blog, o blog.
intentional enter of demonstrative evidence.

screaming decide.

or do of course

How dost thou beckon?
Voiceless yet alluring.

endless wanderings to heaven's end predisposed

"Why?" she asks... lingering, unexpected thesaurus of what is no longer

How .... "There is a way that seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death."

archaic & a roulette of sorts



Why that? Why NOT that? or this. or that. or that. or even this.
easy --------------> practice makes perfect.

rejection or embrace as though a contradicted and fading existence

a suttle provoke or a desperate plea?

body.

Here's a couple interesting stories from this week...

Friend #1
On Tuesday, he hears the Lord speaking to him that he should speak on "God's greenhouse." He thinks this is quite odd, but starts looking into it anyway. He tells no one but hopes he will get some kind of confirmation.

Friend #2
Decides to give Friend #1 a gift for Hanukkah everyday this year. This same Tuesday, just before service, Friend #2 brings Friend #1 the most random gift in the world. A USB powered Greenhouse.

Confirmation much? (and btw... that word was amazing- if u didn't get to hear it, think "greenhouse= the presence of the Lord" and then go study greenhouses. what a word. legit.)

Here's another one for you....

Friend #3
Lives in AZ, knows my family, but none of my friends....yet. ;)

Yesterday afternoon she sends me this text:
"Reading my old journals today and cant stop laughing/smiling... "talked with Tim today about our call to be salmon - to swim upstream, as hard as that may be, and claim the higher pools. LORD search me and know me; I want to bring to You a life that is holy and sanctified through You." :)

Friend #4
Lives here in Cleveland, TN.

Posts this on her status today:
Lets say life is a river, then pursuing Christ requires swimming upstream. When we stop swimming, or actively following Him, we automatically begin to be swept downstream. Where are you in the river of life today?

Are you swimming upstream?

Are you slowly floating downstream away from Christ?

Or has the river completely sweep you downstream?
____

So a greenhouse and an upstream journey- I'd say we'd better heed these words church. Its time that we stay in the presence of the Lord and gain His energy. If we are going to swim upstream, its not going to be easy so we must take refuge in His strengthening presence- His greenhouse.

I love how the Lord continually confirms His word over and over again through His people... and half the time they don't even know what they are doing or saying. God is so, so faithful to keep His children "on the same page" and working as His body regardless of if they know one another or not, regardless of if they have done all the right stuff this week, regardless of if they know all the right people or not, regardless... well, you get the point. He's faithful and He's good and He loves His children enough to continually show us that if we will fix our eyes on Him, this whole body thing- it just works.

For some study on the awesomely functioning body of Christ-- check out Ephesians 4:1-16.

rhythm.

Faithful King
You are the Most Excellent One
Your eyes
burn like fire, they leave me undone
Your face
so beautiful, drawing me to your heart
Your mercies
new every morning
Your orchestration
so fun and so very divine
Your body
desiring purity, Your cleansing, Your heart
You mold us.
You make us one.

I hear a sound
like thunder, like rain
Its the sound of an army arising
moving to the rhythm of your heartbeat

This rhythm
burns
captivates
stirs
consumes.

Here we are, marching as one
We will move with the winds of your favor
We will carry the burdens of your heart
We will love as you have first loved us
We will
GO.

There's a generation
moving
across the earth
shifting
cultures of our day
journeying
to the unknown
adoring
Your face all the way.

Let us always be strengthened by You Faithful King
Confidently knowing You are with us
Constantly remind us of the rhythm we've captured
Never let us escape the sound of your heart
Fill us with your love and your fire
Captivate our hearts
For the sake of Your Kingdom
We surrender
all.

connect.

Today, a favorite professor of mine was talking in reference to cell phones in church and said,"would any of you who work at churches consider telling your congregation to leave their phones in the car?... I mean, I want to go vertical." While I completely understand his point of view in that we need to take church time to focus our attention above and not on our cellphones, the comment stirred up some already-brewing thoughts and questions in my head.

If I am sitting in a service listening to my pastor, and something really speaks to me, then I may lean over to my friend sitting next to me and simply say a sentence or two affirming what has just been said. I won't have a full on conversation by any means, but I may say a few things. Also, to help me focus and engage, I am probably going to have a Bible and a notebook in front of me to take notes.

I have yet to find anyone that has a problem with either of these things. Most church folks of all ages will do both at some point. However, if I do any of this on my cell phone, some people get quite upset.

With all due respect to the semi- technology- illiterate individuals, I wonder if their hatred for this is due to the amount of effort, thought and time that it takes them to text, tweet, type or update. What may take them 10 minutes of complete focus is something I can do in about 15 seconds without much thought- just like leaning over and saying something to the person next to me. Some think that by picking up my phone I must've been completely disengaged and distracted. But what they may not realize is that while they were writing down that quote from Pastor and hoping that they would remember to tell it to Aunt Sue later on, I just posted that same quote to Aunt Sue's "wall," put it as my "status", and "tweeted" it allowing her and potentially 700 of my "friends" and "followers" to see it. All in about 15 seconds.

A few weeks ago on a Saturday night, I was sitting around a bonfire with a group of friends talking about the Lord. One specific discussion, we went around the circle recalling some of our favorite moments in the glory of the Lord. The following morning, I am sitting in service and my pastor starts talking about glory. Then, his first point is "recall the stories." Immediately I made the connection to the previous nights conversation, reached for my phone, and sent a quick text to one of my friends saying "At church this morning he's talking about glory...First point? Recall the stories. Reminds me of last night :)" She texted back saying, "Love it:)" to which I said, "Me tooo." That was it. It was encouraging for she and I both for me to send that quick text. Had almost anyone been sitting next to me, for me to lean over and quitely say, "wow, thats awesome! my friends and I had this conversation just last night!" they would have been completely okay with that and even encouraged by it, but some would've had a serious issue if they had seen me pick up my phone.

A couple weekends ago, I was at a conference in Baltimore. Throughout it, I "tweeted" some of the awesome stuff that was going on... here are some of the tweets:

>>> Tune in now. This is awesome in the Lord. https://events.globalawakening.com/topics-voa-2010

>>> @Amanda_Fisher is in awe of the beauty of Christ revealed through laid down lovers. Whoa. My heart= encouraged.

>>> "The best thing about God is, uhhh, God."-Leif Hetland

>>> Beach balls a.k.a. "joy bombs" are flying through the crowd this morning as we sing the Happy Song. Legit. :)

>>> Ok...If these songs are the next Jesus Culture album, I'm already a fan.

>>> "It WAS God! It was God! It was God! It was God!" - Randy Clark. The Lord just gave him a word that 20 people were gonna get healed...


Each of these "tweets" were during services. They automatically post to my facebook as well so though each probably only took a few seconds for me to post, hundreds could potentially see what God was up to in Baltimore while they were going about their everyday business. Because I provided the link too, many were able to tune in to the live feed of the services. Some of my "friends" and "followers" are not believers. I cannot help, but to think that sometimes them seeing a status or tweet about the goodness of my God, just might plant a seed.

Is limited cell phone use in a service a problem? Is it really different than saying something real quick to the person next to you?

For some people, maybe so. Maybe for them to use their phones during services means that they are connecting back to all their issues that they should put aside when they are taking time to focus on the Lord. Maybe for others, its a bad idea because it takes them a long time and lots of concentration to do much with their phone. But for some, like myself, its a useful part of my corporate worship experience.


Now- don't get me wrong. I think there are times when it is awesomely important to remove all sources of communication and technology and get away from it all. However, we must recognize, that a large percentage of people simply aren't going to completely shut off their technology every week.

With a technology driven society, we have got to figure out how to connect effectively. Disregarding a huge part of people's lives is simply not going to cut it.
There are many options of how to intertwine technology, specifically social networking into church services, but this blog is already long enough.


So I leave you with these questions- should we suggest to a technological generation to put away their phones altogether, when we know they will probably only switch it to vibrate and will probably use it once or twice during a service anyway? Or should we teach them how to weave their relationship with Jesus into every aspect of their lives, including all areas of communication, and to use their technology effectively to express their faith?

thoughts?

Lee.

Dear Lee and the people thereof,

Sweet Jesus is coming. He is here, but He is coming.

Compelling.
Drawing.
Longing.
Sweeping us off our feet.

He is for us. He believes in us.

His thoughts about us and for us are higher-
Higher than we can dream, Higher than we can imagine.

This semester is make or break- and His way dominates.
He wants it more than we do. He wins, He will have His way.

He has proved His heart for our University, now its our time to choose.
Will we run with Him, ride His wave, advance His Kingdom?

or are you simply fine with how things are?

send.

I want the fire of the Lord.
His deep cleansing
His captivating eyes
His painful purification
His glorious power
His intimate encounters
His public display
All of it.

Send you're fire.

crazyland.

I was talking to a dear friend this evening, processing with her some of what the Lord did this weekend. We went to an awesome prophetic conference and both of us got some pretty direct words. I say direct, but really they were just glimpses. We have little pieces of the picture, but really, so much is unknown. In our conversation, she said this:

"hahahaha...this is crazy land..im not sure my personality can take all this craziness and unknowing! "

I liked that she called all this crazyland, so much so that it inspired this blog.

O the truth behind her statement!

We really can't handle this, but- Its by our weakness that His strength is perfected. (2 Cor. 12:9) We recognize that God has so much in store yet chooses to only let us see glimpses. He is requiring in this hour that we shift our ways of thinking and recognize that we have to step out boldly in complete trust and submission to Holy Spirit. Theres so much going on, and not going on, all at the same time--its crazyland! haha (okay, okay, so what if its cheezy, i like it...)

The Lord has our best interest in mind and wants to take us on an absolutely incredible journey. However its imperative that we come to Him with complete faith and trust.

Think of a young talkative kid. Notice how they ask questions about absolutely everything and believe every word you say. The Lord wants us to be this way. He wants us to be anxious for nothing, but in everything, with prayer and petition, with thanksgiving make our requests known unto Him. (Phil 4:6) He tells us to be like little children, coming to Him humbly receiving the Kingdom of God. (Mark 10)

His desire is to be with us. His plans for us are great. Though, we must step into a place of agreement with Him, believing that He has everything under control and trusting that He really is for us.

The Lord is doing so much right now. His move is requiring our obedience and our trust. Things may seem crazy, accelerated, random, and often unknown, but He knows exactly what He's doing.

"For as many as are led by the Spirit, these are the sons of God." Romans 8:14

For all of you who are jumping in right now and catching the wave of the Spirit, I say continue to be led by Him. Trust that He is for you. Believe that He is good. Expect the unexpected. Recognize His ways. Walk in peace. Stay connected to community. Know that your new "normal" may be quite abnormal. You're not going to be understood by many. You won't be able to just "figure it out" anymore, for His ways are higher. Look here--Ecclesiastes 8:16 and 17 from the Message translation:

"16 When I determined to load up on wisdom and examine everything taking place on earth, I realized that if you keep your eyes open day and night without even blinking, 17 you'll still never figure out the meaning of what God is doing on this earth. Search as hard as you like, you're not going to make sense of it. No matter how smart you are, you won't get to the bottom of it."

So relax and trust. He is up to something huge. The more He is doing, the wilder the adventure.

Welcome to Crazyland. Enjoy the ride.

honor.

To my generation- those under 30:

Lets say I love Jesus and I want to express my faith through my tattoos. You are fine with that, and you seem to care less that it offends Sister Sue. Yet, when Sister Sue expresses her passion for the Lord by shouting, you think you have every right to criticize her and tell her she is an illegitimate, hype-seeking, attention hungry woman.

Are the tattoos wrong? Probably not. Yet it bothers some.

Is the shouting wrong? Probably not. Yet it bothers some.

Why are your expressions right and theirs wrong? You can say her shouting brings too much attention on her, but who’s to say your tattoos don’t bring too much attention on you? Now replace tattoos with dancing, or painting or any other expression for that matter…. It just breaks my heart that truly awesome warriors have prayed for months and months about this gathering and all you want to do is critique and criticize.

Yes, this event is supposed to be a conversation, but oh how I wish we could conversate without pointing out every negative and talking as if we have no life to offer. Aren’t we supposed to reflect Christ in all we do? I’ve felt like Holy Spirit was having some heartache about this event and I am beginning to see why. He is wanting to come in power and visit us, but so many people are too busy being critical of everyone else. If someone stands behind the pulpit and says that we are supposed to avoid the unclean, do you really think they truly feel that we are supposed to stay away from sinners? Of course not. That is foundational of our faith. If you would continue to listen and recognize that they were talking about being unequally yoked you would see.

Generation, why must we be so critical of the way the message was given? Its time we glean from the wisdom that is shared, recognizing that we may not agree with everything, but that God moves in more ways than just what we have in mind. Maybe the leadership is wrong in a thing or two, but guess what? You are too. Don’t you remember? God’s strength is perfected in our weaknesses. He chooses to work through broken, imperfect people- that’s all of us. Why is it that we criticize our own instead of strengthening them? Shouldn’t we get past our disagreements and unite in the power of the Spirit to see the lost saved? Isn’t that really what this is all about? Not just the event, but our faith as a whole- it’s about seeing the lost come to know our redeeming King. Lets consider strengthening another where we are weak so that we can run this race effectively.

At this Empowered21 event we have an opportunity to truly explore ways to bring forth the message of precious Holy Spirit forward for generations. Its not often that this many nations and incredible men and woman of God gather in one place at one time. I believe that its time that we as the younger generation taking part in this conference rise up in maturity by honoring. We honor the older generation when we trust their leadership and listen to what they have to say. Does that mean we have to agree with absolutely everything? Absolutely not. But in no way should we put ourselves high above them as if we know much more than they do. Let your voice be heard, but lets honor our Mothers and Fathers of the faith as we do so.

- Amanda

metanoia.

My to do lists are miles long, but filled with stuff that seemingly can wait.
Excuses, excuses.
My own laziness and apathy is utterly disgusting to me.
I’m really over putting everything off.
Things that should take moments take hours or days.
Things that should take days take months. Maybe even years.
How stupid.
How gross.
I’m really over this.
What have I been waiting on?

“It’s like we’re waiting on something… something that’s never going to come until we stop waiting.”

O what a reality I need to get.
My apathetic laziness has exhausted me to the point where even the things I do care about seem far out of reach.
Its time I start walking in obedience.
I’m free, now I need to start acting like it.
Thank you God that you’re showing me open doors in my life.
I slam them shut tonight with Your help.
I’m changing my thinking tonight.
Recognizing-
You are my energy

You are my passion
You are my joy
You are my source
You are mine.

You provide me with convicting disgust with my own ways, what grace.
You’ve protected me when I’ve kept doors open, what mercy.
When I have wallowed in my self pity, you have never ceased to relentlessly pursue me to show me affection.
When apathy has kept me still, You have relentlessly moved all around me till my heart can’t help but to respond.
Even when I’ve disobeyed time and time again, You still bestow Your favor.
You have had every reason to be angry with me and yet You send word to me that Your pleased with me, just for me.
You amaze me Jealous One.
I don’t get it, but I won’t turn away Your love.
My heart is Yours.

winter.

its over.

:)

catch.

Hide OR Seek

“Ready or not, here I come!”

I believe that we have gone through such a cleansing season in the body of Christ in recent years. I know that personally, the Lord has dealt with me on many issues big and small. I’ve seen more sin exposed in recent years in the body of Christ and even just in the believers right around me, than I have ever seen before. Yet, I have also seen so much true restoration in the vast majority of these cases. The Lord has been taking us through a difficult season, but its been so Good. He has been preparing us and pouring out great grace for us to get out of our sin and our apathy. He is exposing our sin and complacency for the sake of our healing.

I believe in the coming seasons, God is going to move in a powerful way. He will come with such force, that nothing and no one will be able to stop this move. Because of the preparation the Lord has put us through and the resulting movement of prayer that has swept the nation, the bowls of intercession are filling up and are about to be poured out on a ready people. I believe God is coming like a wave. Some will catch it and some will die.

If you have been one who has attempted to hide in this season, trying to avoid the chastisement of the Lord, I challenge you to turn from your hiding, and begin to seek God with everything in you. His cleansing is not easy nor is it fun, but its ALWAYS worth it. Trust the Lord and open yourself to His purifying fire, while His grace is here. Don't just assume you can get things right later. Don't miss His move.

Catch the wave and enjoy the ride of your life.

settled.

There's the screaming preacher, the cooky jig from the old lady up front, that one line of the song being sung over and over, some man slappin' people across the forehead, people falling down on the ground like limp ragdolls, others shaking and bawling their eyes out, that wild group of youth shouting in what they call "tongues" at the mans crippled legs while he sits there in his wheelchair silently with the palms of his hands turned up to "receive" and some of those ones screaming, you know they were just at that party last week; then there is you- sitting, watching, trying to figure out if any of this has any semblance of reality.

You've grown up around church, its never been quite like this. Sure there has been moments of this over the years, but this so-called "pentecostal power," is becoming more and more frequent when you brave going around it Yet as much as you sort of want to distance yourself from it, it somehow intrigues you. Typically you sit and watch and decide that this is fine for them, but its just not you. Yet lately, theres been a just a twinge of curiosity. Not to the extent that you want to involve yourself necessarily, but just a new curiousity. There was that time a long, long time ago where you had a moment where you yourself acted kinda weird, but definitely not that weird... In that moment, what you felt was awesome, kind of strange, and it faded fast.

Well if this is you at all, let me pose a few things to you.

1. There's more.

There is so much more to the whole Christianity thing than just going to church and the list of things you are and are not supposed to do. There is beauty to this. I'm not talking about big gaudy buildings and big-haired ladies. No. True beauty. Something that draws you in, gives you peace, gives you everything real-- all the ways you have wanted to feel, but never known how to get there. If you truly taste a real encounter with God, you can actually experience for yourself that He is good. Everything about Him is good. When you really allow yourself to dismiss the initial weirdness of "passionate people," and avoid putting up the walls that you are often so quick to build, you can actually get to experience something beautiful. I'll explain, read on.

2. God is far beyond what you've seen.

When you sit in a service with all the weird stuff going on, some of it is simply just people being cooky. Some of it though is completely, and entirely legitimate. Don't get me wrong, some of it is just flat out weird, but God is mysterious. Some people "fall out" or have weird things happen to them because they are simply overwhelmed. Some of it, well I don't know why it happens. God really can meet you in a tangible way. You may not shake or cry or fall down or any of that. But don't immediately write it off. I've seem some people who would never in anyones mind be the one to do all that, be the very ones who experience God in the oddest ways. Then there is some people who just get hooked to the moments of encounter. Truest encounter is when people take experiences and then translate that into their lives- living for something worth dying for, not just feel-good encounters then living how they want the rest of the time.

3. God is good and God is fun.

Everything that is lined out in the Bible is not just a great suggestion of how to make people live "right." I could sit here for hours and type story after story about how in my own life and the lives of many others who have tasted of the "more" of God. These stories are full of incredible, odd and just fun happenings. When you choose more of Him, every day can be filled with truly awesome experiences and its all for deep, deep, awesome purpose. How much better would it be to live with hope and purpose and in the midst have a blast instead of simply seeking fun and then often be left with tons of questions of what your purpose really is.

Not everyone gets to go to Dollar General and watch a girl slam her finger in the car door so hard that the top part of her finger falls off and then get to just pick it up and put it back on for her like nothin happened. Not everyone gets to sit and hear the life dreams of someone they just met 5 minutes before and then realize they are saying the exact things you've dreamed of for years then recognize that the God of the universe allowed you two to meet. Not everyone gets to look at a stranger and be able to tell them what they've been struggling with and then see absolute true freedom come to them as they weep before our compassionate God. Not everyone gets to work hard for something and then see the results of it be absolutely life changing for tons of people instead of just resulting in a few dollars for themselves. Not everyone runs in to financial problems and then because of the their faithfulness to the Lord, somehow be completely provided for and never really figure out where that money came from. Not everyone can talk to their friends about how they feel like they are in the same moment in their life as a guy from way-back-when and then hours later hear the same exact thing mentioned in the same context from someone else. Not everyone gets to spend time talking with God and hear something really kinda odd then tell a friend and them look at you with wide eyes, saying "shut up! no way! how did you know that?" Not everyone runs into struggle and finds hope when others are freaking out. Not everyone gets to "see" lots of stuff happen before it actually does. Not everyone gets to be around someone who is truly considering suicide and have the exact thing to say that they need to hear that sets them free and allows them to live a life of complete joy. Not everyone gets to experience the deepest love you could ever feel and it only get deeper and deeper. I could go on and on and on... All of this can and does happen to people who choose to dive into the deeper things of God. In fact every one of these things have happened to my friends and/or myself. I get to have the time of my life, all the time. I can have such similar experiences as someone hours away and then get to talk to them about it later, all because we seek God together. God and His Kingdom is way fun and so worth giving my entire life to. There is always more. The experiences only get greater. The love only gets deeper.

All this to say, I want to invite you to come and taste the deeper, the more, of God. Once you have settled within yourself that He is more than what you see from other people and then choose to try this whole "more" out for yourself, you will discover He is so worth it. And even in the midst of people who are sometimes weird about all this, He is there. All of it begins to come into perspective and you learn to love some of it and get awesome strategy to see change come to the parts that frustrate you and don't reflect your God. Settle for yourself that you want Him and you want to journey with others who just want Him, despite all the wrong thinking about God that has consumed much of the American church. Don't let other people's wrong thinking cause you to miss out on so much. Its the journey of a lifetime and it can be your life. Come along?

If you would like to have people to run with towards the deeper things of God, or if you want to talk about any of this, feel free to shoot me an email. fisher.relentless@gmail.com

opening.

Tonight some friends came in to the room. They helped chip away at the stack (what room and what stack you ask? I described it here).

And you know whats awesome about it? The stack wasn't even brought up. It was just dealt with through a good dose of Holy Ghost refreshing and a beautifully functioning body.

I feel alive tonight. I feel awake. I feel like the glass is just a little clearer. I was honest with the Lord, and He, through that beautifully functioning body, responded to me with liberating truths. He is so good. I am more and more convinced of it every day.

I've also been doing some chipping away myself. Its actually been by doing things that I actually thought may have been part of the source of the stack. What I thought had the potential to add to it, has actually helped get rid of it. Crazy how that works huh? Let me explain.

I was so caught up in trying to "ready myself" for what the Lord wants to do, that I was making it about me. He showed me that if I was truly "ready" when He showed up in power, that it would seem like He did so because I was ready. So for now, I'm opening myself vs. readying myself. I've shifted back to doing things for the Lord out of desire and not just discipline or obligation.

Also, I am learning His voice and trying to just "go with it" even when I question if it was just me... Theres such wonder in hearing and obeying. Sometimes I'm right, sometimes I'm wrong, and many times, I just don't know. Regardless, I would rather err on the side of obedience vs. passivity. Its not easy, but He is worth the journey.

I love His teachings.

honesty.

I come today with a new honesty. Really, I almost named this blog "a new honesty." but i'm just so set on this one word title thing.... anyways.

I've been in Good Hope, GA since last Sunday with little two year old Bella while her family is on the Israel trip with Dr. Lowery. I was greatly urged to take advantage of this 2 weeks by some awesome friends. My response every time this was said to me was, "don't worry, I will."

I wanted to get here and pray and read the Word and read books and do some writing while of course taking great care of Bella.

Well, week one has come to a close, and its looked nothing like I expected. I don't really guess I am surprised by this, what in my life has looked like I expected it to?

Although, as I reflect on this past week, I don't feel like I have been entirely unproductive, I mean, I guess I've learned some things, but overall... I'll be honest (hence the title), I haven't really written, or read much- books or the Bible, nor have I spent much time in prayer.

Now don't get me wrong, I live consistently aware of the Lord and don't know how to not think about Him, but I'm fighting for focus right now. And probably really not fighting, moreso just using the battle as an excuse to sit w/o doing much of anything.

I can't really tell you what I have filled my time with. I haven't done anything wrong, but instead I've simply not done. Sins of omission are my issue, not sins of commission.

Yet, here's where my struggle lies. I refuse to enter into a place of striving that causes confusion. I don't want to be Martha. I want to be Mary and sit at His feet. Yet I recognize that right now, I'm just sitting.

I guess it kind of feels like this:

I'm in a room, just me and Him, but instead of being so close, at His feet, I'm on the opposite side sitting in a chair, hearing Him beckon me and with everything with me wanting to come to Him. But it feels like theres a stack or a wall as high as the ceiling of stuff between He and I. I can still hear Him, I can see Him a little through the cracks between the stuff and I want with everything in me to get over there, I just don't know how. The thought of breaking through that wall tires me out. I'll explain why.

Sometimes His voice is hard to hear because some stuff in the pile makes noise and I can't really make out what He is saying. Other times, the room is just silent. Thankfully I can see Him through the cracks.

Sometimes I sit and make a list of all the ways I'm gonna start tackling this pile, but the moment I get out of my chair and approach it, I fall asleep. Trust me! With everything in me I don't want to fall asleep. So I end up falling down on the hard floor taking a nap. Then I get up sore and go sit back in my chair attempting to regain enough strength to walk over to that stack again.

Sometimes I decide that I'm gonna look at everything and see if I can figure out how to make it leave, then I notice my eyes are on the stuff again and not on Him. So I find a crack and gaze.

Sometimes I walk over to the pile and pick up a book, trying to find a paragraph, a sentence, a word- some kind of solution for all of this and then everything starts being so loud again, to where even the best scholars couldn't concentrate. So I wander back over to my silent chair and sit-staring through the cracks to make sure He is still there.

Of course, I always know that He will be, He's never left me or forsaken me.

Sometimes friends come and stand next to me and talk- I love it, they encourage me and give me strength and sometimes don't say a word. They just stand there and gaze at Him with me. I often wish that they in their strength could help me rid the room of the stack, but they don't seem to know how to get rid of it either. Either that, or they are pretty confident they know how, but they leave without touching it. Sometimes I think He doesn't let them. Others, I don't think they see it. And some, they see it just like I do- and they hate it just as much as me, but they don't know the answer either. So they comfort me with their hugs and step out.

Sometimes, the room is flooded, on both sides and on top of the stack with people worshipping. Some are even in the middle of it, its almost like they and the stuff are in the exact same spot. I can't get to those places though, because of that pile, the pile that isn't even there for some of them. When the room is full, those are the times when the top part of the stack kind of falls over onto my side and makes a bit of a ramp. In those moments I can run up and dance on top, seeing Him like I only get to in these moments. In these times, I hear and see so clearly. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in His eyes and the joy of everyone around, that I become almost certain its gone. Then, they leave and its like one of those blowy, noise maker, party things- its sticks straight out when you blow into it and rolls right back up the moment you quit.(unless you have one of the ghetto ones like at Christina's party, but thats beside the point and does not work for my illustration...) Anyways, when they leave, the ramp rolls right back up and I slide down and plop down in my chair again. Now sometimes the Ramp rolls up slowly, but needless to say, it ALWAYS rolls back up. Why? Heck if I know, I don't even know why the whole thing is there in the first place. I can't even tell you what all the stuff is- its just stuff.

THAT is the very reason that I never want to stop. I'd love to see revival hit where we just stay in a consistent flow, and people don't ever leave that room, so that I don't have to worry about the wall.

At least I'm in the room with Him, I'm honored that He would continue to be with me, and to beckon me, I just wish I knew how to get over there or stay on top or...wow. I guess I just realized something. I suppose I have been on top of the stack where I can see clearly and hear clearly and dance with absolute freedom, but I don't guess I've ever made back down onto His side where I can sit with Him. Maybe I've never tasted freedom in its truest sense. Maybe all February 26,2007 (the day I was freed from confusion) did was unclog all the holes so I could see through the cracks.

So, what to do?

I know, I know, "prayer and fasting and seeking."

Or the other answer, "you don't have to do anything!"

So which is it?

A healthy balance? Maybe. I don't know, but I wish someone would help me achieve that, or tell me how to not do anything and still be doing those things, or get rid of the stack for me, or tell me how to get over there, tell me how to get entirely rid of the big wall of stuff, or...... just something.

A lot of people would just get too frustrated and walk out of the room completely complaining that its just too hard, but I would never, could never, will never, ever, ever do that.

Because He has ravished my heart. His compassion and love overwhelms me. I'm madly in love with Him and He with me. I will never ever leave this room. He and I both know that.

I'm so close to Him, but I won't stop. I must get to His feet on the other side of this thing.

With tears welling up in my eyes, I'm asking, will you help? Even if you don't know how, maybe at least now you will be aware.

I need you desperately.

commitment.

Lord I commit to look at Your face and not just Your heart. I will draw near to who you are through obedience to Your Rhema and Your Logos. I commit to read and to run. I'm running into Your open arms again. Lord, I refuse to just seek out what is on Your heart for me to do, but instead I seek out intimacy with my King. Lord, instead of searching for Your heart, I'm going to let You see mine. Through this, I will be positioned to gain Your heart instead of just seeing whats on Your heart with no means to fulfill it. This is my commitment my Lord, Here I come.

detour.

I'm connected with a ministry called the Extreme. I posted a blog on our myspace today- check it out: Ice Cream Detour

again.

I want to fall in love all over again 

Capture me in your arms

I need your strength and power

Jesus I need You to come and fill me

all over again

Lord I commit to you today all over again

I've had to say it over and over

Yet Your grace still covers me

and You welcome me into Your presence

all over again

Teach me to find everything in You all over again

teach me to rid myself of myself more each day

Teach me to sound like You 

and walk like You, and talk like You

all over again

God I want You to consume my thoughts all over again

I pray that You fill my mind with whats on Yours

I need clarity and wisdom 

and for You to renew my mind

all over again

Lord I am overwhelmed by Your love all over again

thank You for never ceasing to amaze me

You are more than enough for me

Just thinking on You, I'm falling in love

all over again

unleashed.

1.  So I think its pretty weird.... 

that some of the people I'm closest to these days have never seen that side of me.

I don't know what it is... I get into what has been affectionately called "mander unleashed" mode. and i dont even know what goes on. lots of laughter, and lots of insanity. and really this whole side of me that could potentially be VERY annoying to many people, I mean really. it almost annoys me. but not around certain people. hmmm.... maybe its the whole, be all things to all people? who knows. not me. of course what do i know these days??

2.  in other news, I need to write, yet never know what to write. 

I still get asked all the time what I am doing. well um. I know that I'm not going back to school. and that the Lord has been showing me that I need to write more. well I often sit in front of a notebook or a computer and stare... and get like halfway through a sentence and usually not even finish it. really, the purpose of this here blog, is just so I'm writing... this is better than nothing.

3.  I remembered tonight part of the reason why I love being at the Element. the ways of thinking some of these people have are so far beyond normalcy. really, its just stuff I never really seem to think about otherwise. Like for example tonight- they were talking about God's will.  And if we are supposed to just seek the Lord and make our own decisions knowing that by seeking God we will be in His will no matter what we choose, or if we are supposed to wait around for confirmation and a direct word as far as what to do. Personally, I lean more towards the latter, but really in between. Yes, seek the Lord, use wisdom, consult authority, etc. I dont necessarily think theres anything intrinsically wrong with just choosing things, but I have seen the unique beauty that comes from waiting on the Lord. 

Well. there it is. a few thoughts on paper (or computer screen- whatever). Its a start. more like a re-start I guess. 

follow.

I am done asking why. 

I've been asking the Lord that question for too long. 

And attempting to make sense of things that probably aren't meant to make sense.

So often I question what I think the Lord might be saying to me instead of just doing it. 

And you know what? its not too often that I get an answer. 

All it does it create stress and really the hated word, confusion. 

Why would I create something I hate? 

Thats why I'm done asking why. 

Its time to just act on what I feel the Lord is saying. 

If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. 

Holy Spirit will show me if its displeasing to Him.

If I am right and it simply makes no sense, chances are, it will in the future. and if not, so what. its not my will I am after anyways. If He wants me to do something for no reason at all, I'll still do it- just to please my Father. 

And the 'What ifs' and regrets are just dumb. 

I'm over that too. It gets me nowhere. 

So for everyone who wants to know what in the world I'm doing, 

I've been saying, I don't know, but really, I do know. 

Following the cloud and the fire. And gathering stones on the journey.

faithful.

Hebrews 3:1-3 (The Message)
1 So, my dear Christian friends, companions in following this call to the heights, take a good hard look at Jesus. He's the centerpiece of everything we believe,2 faithful in everything God gave him to do. Moses was also faithful, 3 but Jesus gets far more honor. A builder is more valuable than a building any day.


God I pray that we have the revelation of how faithful You are.
When we are walking through the valley of the shadow of death, let us remember that its only a shadow.
Let us take comfort in your faithfulness. For Your love never fails. 

By You, O God, I stay amazed.

Faithful Lord, when You get the greatest Glory, I get the greatest good.

When I am hurting, You are faithful to mend my brokenness.
When I am dry, You are faithful to wash me in Your cleansing flood.
When I am weak, I am so very strong. For Your faithfulness remains- its  my weakness that perfects Your power.
Thank You Lord for being faithful and just to forgive my sins.

You never leave me or forsake me.

God You are the faithful God-
The one who keeps Your covenant of love to a thousand generations to those who love You and keep Your commands.
The one who does no wrong, You are upright, and just.
The one who shows Yourself faithful to the faithful.
The one who keeps us strong.
The one who protects, cleanses, and forgives.
The Creator who cannot deny Himself, thus remains faithful even in our faithlessness.
You are Faithful in all You do.
You are the rider on the white horse, called Faithful, and True. In righteousness You judge and make war.

Your faithfulness makes it so easy to trust You.
May I learn to be faithful to You, Jesus, just as You have been faithful to the Father.

Faithful and True, I honor You today.

Selah.

urgency.

Never in my life have I seen and heard so much emphasis and talk about the end times. 

Never in my life have I sensed such an urgency in the Spirit -- theres such a drawing towards prayer right now- prayer without ceasing.

We are reaching a point where the dividing line between the saved and the unsaved will begin to become very clear. For so long, so many have claimed to be saved and have not lived a lifestyle that brings glory to the Father.

 The Lord is placing a demand on our commitment right now. 

We as the body of Christ are in a time where our faith, belief, and trust are being tested in so many ways.  The Lord is drawing hearts and revealing Himself to His people. 

We are reaching a point where we must decide- die to ourselves now or die an eternal death.

The middle ground is fading away. 

I sense an urgency in the Spirit like never before.

I long to see the face of my King like never before.

No longer will I sit still waiting on life to happen around me. 

No longer will I feel as though there is nothing to do.

No longer will I be shy about the beauty of the Father. 

I am so over what people think.

For so long I have said people don't bother me, yet I change what I talk about around so many people as to not be viewed as "overly spiritual."

I am so over that! 

I take delight in the fact that people will be able to see that I am in such an intimate, close relationship with the King of the Universe. There is absolutely no shame in that, what an honor!

I have a peace and a confidence that will sustain me and propel me into the promises the Lord has shared with me. 

However, I am realizing more and more that my life is not to be lived with the focus on getting to that promise, but focus on Glorifying the Father and being placed into that promise. 

I cannot get myself there. Learned that one.

I WILL live my life to bring Glory to my Father every day. 

 

Is the Lord coming back soon? Well no man knows the day or the hour, yet I refuse to ignore the drawing that is  becoming so evident throughout the body. 

I don't know when the Lord will return, and what its all going to look like, but I will take heed to this drawing. I will bring Glory and Honor to my Father daily and live life with a constant awareness of the urgency of the hour. 

Whether the Lord is coming tomorrow or ten thousand years from now, He has marked this season with an intimate urgency for a purpose.

I will not ignore this.

WEIGHT IS EVIDENT.

strength.

STRENGTH ARISING

peace and boldness resound today

I am so thankful for all God has done today. Its been an incredibly refreshing day. The Lord knew my heart even though my body and emotions were screaming resistance. I'm so glad He sees past all that. He has blown me away with His faithfulness today. What peace and joy. And really, its been so easy. So--- not me. I've reached my end.  tired, worn out, weak, in pain.  I exhausted myself and all my resources. I gave up and He moved in.

There is so much joy in the freedom of this journey. Doing what I know to do makes life so easy. Its only my mind that complicates things. Simple obedience is such freedom. I am so in love with my savior. I love loving Him. Through the hurt, the pain, and the ' I don't knows'  its so so so beautiful. 

Thanks God for showing up and showing off today.  I love Your ways. 

and I love You, Precious One.

Selah.

weird.

how in the world.

i feel like I could do so much more

I feel like my commitment level to the Lord could definitely be greater. 

Yet I am the one who is looked at as 

weird, or out there, or extravagant, or waaaay spiritual... 

if culture decides what is "weird" as far as spirituality, 

then why don't some of us decide to be the weird ones who dare to walk in the things of the Lord and create a new normal.

What would that do for the next generation?

just a thought. 

confession.

all the time in the world to sleep

yet im so tired

i dont want to sleep

i want to do something

yet its so hard to do anything right now

i dont know how to do this right now

its like i dont even have the energy to come to the one who can give me rest

i need joy

im done with saying I am great

then the next minute feeling no so great

i am excited about being away from everyone. 

because then there is no one to ask me what I am doing. I get that question too many times, every single day. 

and then theres talking about 'the situation.'- just so you all know, I have more peace about that than anything else in life right now. I am not frustrated, or the least upset or angry about it. That whole thing has God all over it. Duh the situation was not of God, but He does not waste our pain or our mistakes. The only thing that even remotely bothers me about that whole thing, is facing judgemental people who do not know the heart of that family... anyways moving on. 

I just dont know

overall, i mean life is great, i have great friends, great family, 2 great churches to call home, great stuff, a great relationship with the King of the Universe

yet 

i am  

not 

okay. 

I'll admit it. 

I am weak.

I am not disciplined at all right now.

I am not using time wisely. 

I am frustrated. 

I need help.

I need my community. 

Yet I feel so distant from every community I have ever been a part of.

I want to commit, yet I refuse to jump into something that I don't feel released to do. 

I want direction, and want to plug in and connect somewhere right now more than any of you can imagine. 

Its not as easy as just choosing something. If only you knew what happens on the inside of me the moment I consider doing anything right now.

Nor is it easy to wait. too much time makes my already crazy mind go crazier.

I need help. I just want consistency. somewhere.

no thats not all I want. 

I just have to know. thats all. I want to know.

yes. I want to know what I am doing is right. whatever that is. and God knows I am open.

I know what I "need" to do with this time

I dont need that from anyone, my head is enough.

I know the "answers"

trust. wait. have patience. pray. ask God. read the word. connect somewhere. find someway to occupy your time. pray more. read the word more. discipline yourself. yet dont strive. declare the word over yourself. speak positively. read this book and that one. and on and on. i know. 

and I know all the scriptures about the peace of God, and trusting God and waiting on Him, and resting and burdens and all of that.

Yes I believe it all. but no I am not walking in it right now. yet I am. all at the same time. I'm well past the point of no return, so its not like I am sinking down, I am just weak.

I need you.

to pick me up

and carry me

and protect me

and dont let the enemy continue to do this to me

and, well, i dont even know. 

I just cant continue on like this. 

sure I can "continue on"

as i said, i am not sinking down, 

i will live life, and go to church and talk to people like normal

but i just at least need you to know whats going on, on the inside. 

i dont know how to tell u to help.  or what to tell you to do. other than pray. i guess that is all anyone really can do right now. and i just need you to know that i need you. whoever you are. and whatever that means.

unfailing.

I don't know where I am going,
and I'm not doing much of anything right now

Just waiting.
Its one of the most unsettling things ever

and it makes me feel like a lazy slacker
yet at the same time,

its the only thing that feels remotely right at the time.

not fun.

and every day, 14,000 people ask me what I am doing.
and all I can say is

I

DON'T 

KNOW.

Sure, I'm glad they're concerned, but I have nothing to say.

and I hate it. 

hmmm. guess that might be a good thing-- very humbling.

everyone has a different suggestion. 

and none of it feels right. 

at all.

I suppose I just have to pick some route soon...

or do I just continue to wait for the right door?

or is it already open and I am just blind to it?

I don't even have any idea whatsoever what the wise decision is here. 

sometimes, the whole trust thing, it stinks.

I just can't convince myself to choose any other way. 

It will be worth it. 

Its got to be.

In my life up to this point 

trusting God AND His timing

has ALWAYS paid off

I mean really. I'm reminded of a good ol' classic song-

I have so much to thank God for

So many wonderful blessings, and so many open doors....

For every mountain You have brought me over 

For every trial You have seen me through

For every blessing, HALLELUJAH

For this I give You praise...

I end up going places and doing things and getting to glorify God

in ways that not a lot of people get the opportunity to do

and its amazing.

I will endure through this,

I will continue to trust

and it will pay off. 

I know my God and I know He keeps His promises.

I am an olive tree in my Daddy's house.

I will trust in His UNFAILING LOVE. Always.

power.

Where is the power?

Does God have us in a season of waiting and testing?
or are we refusing His movement?

Will we walk in freedom?
or are we too proud to see that we are bound?

Are we welcoming His spontaneous intervention?
or are we embarrassed?

Are we open to His fire?
or are we refusing the pain that accompanies the glory?

Do we even want Him?
or are we fine with what we have?

Will we see revival?
or are we too arrogant to repent?

Can we break out of our complacency?
or are we just going to continue to wallow in self-pity?

Will we return to our first love?
or continue to look in all the wrong places?

Will we walk in the unity He desires for us?
or continue to wait till everything fits our taste?

Will we see the signs and wonders and miracles?
or is our focus only on our entertainment and convenience?

Will we see mass salvations?
or are we waiting for them to somehow stumble into our churches?

Will we even see salvations in our churches?
or will we miss opportunities because something isn't done our way?

Will we stand strong when our nation is weak?
or choose to believe we are in recession too?

Will we have confidence in the face of adversity?
or walk in fear as if we have no where to turn?

Have we forgotten our roots?
or have we forsaken them?

Where is the power?

Will we even ask the question?

belong.

[inspired by JonGreen]

Sure. there will always be moments where our feelings seem to get the best of us, but its important to remind ourselves of the truths that we KNOW deep inside the promises we can hide in our hearts. be encouraged:

We are all human. thus in your relationships you will have times of hurt, of pain, of disappointment. BUT there IS a friend that sticks closer than a brother. Wounds from a friend are worth it. Counsel that comes from the heart of a friend makes the heart rejoice. Strive to be the friend you see in scripture, and you will reap what you sow. Love at all times. Stick closer than a brother and let iron sharpen iron.

Sure, bear one another's burdens, but lay down your burden for the Lord's. For His yoke is easy and His burden light. It fulfills the law of Christ to bear the burden of another, but He also promises that His burden is light... Therefore even the burden of another MUST be light if carried within the context of God's word.

Your King. The King of the Universe. He desires intimacy with You. You know How much He wants it? He reached and is reaching down to a tiny dot on a tiny blue dot in a tiny galaxy in a universe too massive for every ounce of our technology to discover.... wow. Thats who you belong to. Take joy. and comfort. and peace. and rest. and purpose. and life in THAT God. Your God.

silence.

I will never stop

chasing

I will pass this

test

I won't ever

quit

For when I am

weak

Then I am

strong

You are my

peace

In you I find my

zeal

Your grace is

sufficient

I am absolutely

thankful

For it is in my

weakness

that Your

power 

is made

perfect.

sovereign.

You are so beautiful
You respond to my longing
and my desires
and my earnest heart's cry

This is EXACTLY why I trust
You sustain me
You give me peace when the road takes an unpleasant turn
You give me joy

I don't deserve your faithfulness
You are provider to me
You are my strength
You are the God of lost things, big things and small things

Even though I still can't see what's up ahead
You come reveal yourself and assure me
NO, THIS LIFE IS NOT IN VAIN
Nor is this season you are in.

O God, how I long to be with you
How I long to know I am in your will
For you are so worthy of all of me
All I am is yours.

prophecy.

Resolutions usually don't ever work, because its about what we can and can't do. Thus I am going to prophecy over myself for 2009 because then its in His hands. and He is a lot stronger than me...and with prophecy i can step into things that I know I cannot do on my own. This is quite liberating--I encourage you to do the same for your own life.




Amanda Michelle Fisher,
I prophecy for 2009:
You are in a season of discovering the reformer in you. You will step into that role at an accelerated pace.
You are hearing the voice of the Lord clearer than ever and moving in whatever direction the Spirit leads.
Your eyes are being opened to the word and your mind is focused through His renewing power.
You have a renewed strength in your mind and body.
You will continually walk in exceedingly abundant joy.
You will discover a new peace through intimacy with the Father.
Your life of prayer will be deepened and you will be continually enticed by the Holy Spirit and love every moment of it.
You will have opportunities to nurture others until they can nurture themselves and you will complete this task almost without even realizing it.
The Spirit inside of you will change the atmosphere everywhere you go.
You will hear and obey the voice of wisdom.
You will love like you have never loved.
You will accomplish much for the Kingdom.
You will go where eyes have not seen and ears have not heard, all for the glory of the Lord.

reminisce. 003.

THE FOLLOWING IS A GROUP OF SEVERAL BLOGS I WROTE WHILE AT THE AZUSA STREET CENTENNIAL. (slightly edited to fit this progression of days) ITS TOO LONG FOR MOST PEOPLE'S READING ENJOYMENT, BUT I REALLY DID IT FOR ME. ANYHOW, ENJOY IF YOU WISH.
___________________________________________

Friday, April 21, 2006

I'm Here!
Ok so its weird to think that its actually here. My whole family has been talkin about the Azusa Street Centennial for like 3 years. For a long time i didnt even know what they were talkin about and then, the closer it got the more I have learned about it and anticipated it. So after all these months of my parents and other family members doing tons of preparations and traveling a lot, the time has finally come. Ok so really it doesnt officially begin till Tuesday, but there is some pre stuff tho.So ya. We are here. In LA. I am soo excited to see what the next several days will hold. Its gonna be RETARTED! (That basically means something along the lines of really insanely awesome, for you non-rampers who may have been confused). Anyways ya. Any of you feel free to call me at any time (505-3440) and I will let you know how things are goin. And I will also try to put some stuff on here. ByeBye!

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Saturday, April 22, 2006


Whoa.
Current mood: jubilant

Heres an update... Whoa so today was really really awesome. Early today i went to a meeting with all the people running like the flow of traffic and the flow of people at azusa like the people who run the sports arena the coliseum and traffic directors and cops and stuff and then also like the main people running the centennial. it was pretty interesting to say the least. u dont realize how much planning has to go in to this kinda thing till u go to somethin like that. so ya and then i went with my parents and the main director dude billy wilson(who took my grandpas place) and his like secretary or something and we went to eat at this real good italian place. then on the way back to our hotel, we were sittin in the car and my dad was asking billy if he was going to this prayer thing at union church tonight and he was like no i have meetings but ya i think lou engle will do a great job. and i was like WHAT?! i just looked at my mom and she was like ya we were gonna let u be surprised. so then i was pumped. and so then we were at the room and my grandma got there and stuff and then after a while we left to go to the church. we got there early so we walked over to the original location of the azusa street mission building thingy.
Friday, April 21, 2006

so that was cool and then we went back to the church and wow it was crazy. Holy Ghost was all up in that place! it was awesome! it was a small church and there was only like maybe 50 people there. Before lou got up there, this dude was talkin and he was talking about how a bunch of youth he had been with were getting the revelation that awakening was gonna come through unity and then this guy took the mic (i think it was jessie engle but i am not positive. several kids were there with lou. ya. sweet.) and he started singin the chorus of you are holy and every body joined in and we sang you are worthy and you are holy. it was sweet. so then lou spoke

and it was awesome and he talked alot about God remembering the work of those who moved his heart and how we can change the heart of heaven. It was pretty sweet. and then we went in to prayin and several youth prayed on the mic at different times.

and then after we prayed for a while, we did this thing where we got in circles and talked and then prayed some more. it was pretty incredible.

And then these two old spirit-filled black ladies got up there and were shoutin and testifyin and dancin and talkin bout the old days and about what God is doing now and stuff. they were so cute! everyone was laughin. that was fun. i didnt get to talk to lou tonight cuz they had to leave, but i am pretty sure i will get to within the next few days. Ya so today was awesome. this blog is really long and that wasnt even all of it. Jesus blows my mind. And today is only the first full day of bein here...wow.

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Sunday, April 23, 2006


Sweet!

This morning at like 9, there was a 3 mile Holy Ghost processional march thingy that went from the Bonnie Brae street house to the original Azusa Street location. The Bonnie Brae Street house was where the revival began with a prayer meeting, and then so many people were there that the porch collapsed and then they decided to move to a new location thus being 312 Azusa Street. (there was a sentence-long history lesson for ya.)

So anyways on the way there, our driver got us lost so we were a little bit late but not too bad. Well in the car we were talkin about how we didnt know how many people were gonna be at this thing and dad was like well maybe like 100 or so. So then we get to the Bonnie Brae house and were basically blown away.

So at first we were standing down in the road with everyone but then Jack Hayford spotted my grandma and so we got to go up right in front of the house with all the VIPs.

So then the march started. And we were at the front and could look back at all the people. And as the march went on we got to a couple hills and turns where we would look back and people just kept comin. So much for the 100 people! There ended up being 3-5 thousand! It was awesome!

So we went along for a long time and took lots of pictures and listened to music and talked to people and stuff . There was a lot of countries represented there. And there was different groups like the Bahama Brass Band and a bunch of Filipino's that were singin and flag groups and all kinds of people.



The parade ended up at the Azusa Street site where they have a tent set up on the original location of where the building was.

Jack Hayford led a thing out there under the tent for the people who were there before the processional got there.

Then all the people from the processional got there and then that began worship, prayer, singin, dancin, and shoutin, that is gonna go around the clock from what i understand. Sweet!



When all the people from the processional got there, they stayed outside at the tent stuff while we got to go in and eat cake and celebrate what was basically the kick-off event for the Azusa Centennial week. That was some good cake. There was like a ton of press people in there too and someone wanted to interview me but i passed on that one. haha.



David Bishop also presented his painting of the Azusa Street revival. Its pretty awesome.

After all of that, we went back to the hotel which is connected to the mall so we ate in the food court and then i went shoppin but didnt find nothin tho. of course. i stink at shopping. somebodys really gotta help me with that one day. then we went back to the room and went to my grandmas room and her sister was there too so talked to them for a long time and then we just stayed in the room and I talked to rachel and bree and people online and talked to linz and perry on the phone and stayed on myspace for a long time. Fun fun!

---------------------------------

Monday, April 24, 2006


Unity is a good thing.

Today we didnt much because it was sort of our day to rest i guess. So we were just in the room a lot and I went and ate at the California pizza kitchen with my moms boss and his daughter jacki. Later tonight we went over to Azusa street where they have been having around the clock worship and prayer. but before we went out there, me and my mom went to part of the rehersal of the covenant which is a musical they are gonna do here, cuz jacki is in it. So then at about 9:45 we went out to the tent and it was pretty cool. There was quite a few people there. and it was cool to look around and realize that we were some of the very few white people,but then i looked around and realized that there was a awesome mix of peopel all together. Many nations,ages,ethnic groups and denominations were all represented adn we just worshipped together. it was pretty sweet. so anyways these filipino girls sang and led worship and that went good and we all sang a bunch of old but good songs. and then my dad was taking a few pictures and then he motioned for me and mom to come up there. so the 3 of us sat up at the front and realized that were VIPs even when we didnt want to be. haha. because we were about to leave when we went up there and then the guy randomly had my dad speak and pray out of no where. it was funny. he did good tho. but ya tonight was really cool to realize how we could all come together in unity. and it was pretty awesome because of that.

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Sunday, May 07, 2006


Azusa stuff. (World's longest blog)

I definately did not have time like at all to update this thing towards the end of the week in LA. and then once or twice I deleted blogs. Annoying... and then i had a busy week so ya. Here we go for some Azusa updates...I'm gonna start back at Tuesday to add pictures and stuff.



Tuesday
so today i got up really really early and we had to leave the room by 7:30. so we get to the convention center and there was already a bunch of people and more kept comin and comin and before we knew it people were in a big mob waiting to get in the door for the first general session with charles blake and ron kenoly. and the registration line grew and grew and started going way down halls and stuff. i didnt go in the session but could see it from the second story in the office where my dad was. its actually a really cool view from there cuz you can see everyone. it was cool to just look through the glass into the service and see thousands of people with their hands raised.

It was great to just sit back and take it all in that all this was actually really finally here and happening. then at 10:15, i went to a ministry tract (like a teaching session) on pentecostal worship in your youth group. well the guy that was supposed to speak had to be in argentina for a meeting so some other dude had to spoke and it was pretty good. nothin incredible, but good. then at 11:30, we didnt go to any of the tracts, me and brooke ray went and ate in the food court. then we went back over and went to a worship conference session and Christ for the nations institute was there and they did great. Jesus was there more than them so ya. good stuff. they sang eddies's lion of judah, that was good. ha. Then after them this dude named georgian got up there and he was well....interesting. he was a great violinist but his singin was kinda um different. but the weird thing is that he did everything to a track and it wasnt even a split track. so no live band no nothin... just him and the cd. o and the violin. and the crazy thing is that u could hear him singin and playin on the cd and on the mic and it wouldnt always quite line up...ya we definately couldnt take this guy seriously and we ended up just leavin. but it did us for a good laugh. then i ended up goin back to the hotel for a while then back to the convention center to hear benny hinn. so we got there and we decided to just listen and watch from the upstairs office through the window looking down into the service. so we went up there and it was awesome to watch. You hear peopel talking about a "wave" of worship, well ya i really understand that now. because we would watch and you really could see the wave of the spirit. it was incredible. like people responding at different times in different ways so it looked like waves. ya.

cool. we also saw this woman get up out of her wheel chair and start pushin it around. it was great. and then later he said if you are hungry for the spirit to go up there and so thousands of people rushed up to the front and so then we got to watch as benny hinn prayed for different sections of the crowd and it was like a wave or like dominoes people falling out under the power of the anointing of the spirit. and then like at one point my mom looked and saw like several people in different areas of the room all fall at the same time which was cool.so all that was fun. um after that i think i just came back to the room i dont really remember.



Wednesday
Today Darlene Zschech led worship in the morning session and that was great and then Brian Houston who is the pastor of Hillsong, spoke and he did a great job.


He talked about calling and purpose and about how what is in your hands, like what ur good at, is your calling. what you do, and whats in your heart, like who u wanna be, is your purpose and he talked about using whats in your hands to fulfill whats in your heart.
Then at 10:15, I went to a ministry tract called How to Birth your God-given vision. This guy Al Hollingsworth taught it and it was really awesome. Then I didnt go to a tract at the 11:30 time. Judy Jacobs did a tract at that time that I wanted to go to, but it was full and some people were being jerks basically about wanting to get in but the fire marshall stayed at the convention center to make sure we didnt crowd to many people in rooms. So ya. Then I ate with several of the Fisher family up in the offices. so that way we didnt have to leave the convention center. Then me and my momma walked around the exhibit hall some then i went to a few minutes of a worship session at 2. This girl Julie Meyer was there. I liked her a lot. Kinda reminded me of misty edwards or jessie rogers. Ya i know they sound a lot different, but ya basically just a prophetic edge to her music. Good stuff. Then I looked online later and i think she has done stuff with IHOP. Then I had to leave that early to head over to the Azusa site because in theater right by it, was a musical that I went to called the Covenant. It was awesome. I was actually in it a few years ago, but theyve changed some stuff and ya its awesome. Its the story of the nation of Israel and the Jewish people from beginning till present day. Most of the people in it are from Israel and they take this show lots of places but especially all over israel. They added a scene about Azusa street that was sooo powerful. Since my mom works with Ministry to Israel, she knows all these people so we went to th reception afterwards with israel people and pastors and important people basically. After we left there we got a taxi back over to the convention center and we went to the service that Claudio Fredzon and Carlos Anacondia spoke at. What i heard of it was good but i realized i am really bad at trying to listen to translators... then i think we came back to the room.

Thursday.
This mornin i had some really weird rash thing before i left which looked and felt like a sunburn so ya that wasnt good. but then before too long it went away... anyways...Rod Parsley did the general session.

That went really well. At 10:15 I went to a session called A Generation at Risk with Ron Luce. That was good. After that I think I just walked around and stuff and probably went and got junk food out of the green room and stuff and went and hung out upstairs in dads office and stuff. Ok so after the 11:30 sessions, theres not another session till 2. It was like 12 and all the sudden I look out in the hall and there was a massively massive line to get into the Apostolic and Prophetic ministy conference session with Bill Hamon. like hundreds of people. And it just kept growin. Like that session category had been really full all week but this was insane. and the room couldnt even hold that many so they were trying to figure out what to do so they moved a couple of sessions to other rooms and stuff. It was crazy. people everywhere. Then at like 1 i went down to the Re-digging the Wells of Azusa Street session that had also been really full all week. And i got in but had to go to the back against the wall. So I just sat there and watched people. It made me feel like crap too to see the way people were acting just to get in....For some of it I just wanted to be like people this is a Christian event so act like it. But anyways it was crazy and quite a few seemed to think that rules didnt apply to them. but it did make me really proud of some of the staff because they handled some crazy people really well. I was talkin to ashley wilson who was the centennial administrative coordinator, about it later like the next day or something and he said that a couple people came up and apologized after so at least they did that. Basically that whole situation made me realize how much you really do have to guard your actions to not get to that point and how it can be so easy to slip in to acting worse than u probably even realize if you dont. But on to the better part. After the session finally started at 2, it went really really well. Cindy Jacobs spoke. She's pretty awesome. Much of the time was her prophecying over random people. It was cool to see God move like that cuz she read a lot of people's mail.She talked about revival (obviously) and we had some good times of prayer and stuff and we spent some time in worship .Quite fun. All throughout the week, as I would be walking through the convention center, theres was always people prayin for each other or random Holy Ghost times right in the middle of the floor.

It was great to see that all week. Later I hung out with my friend Rachael Caffrey for a while and to make a long frustrating story somewhat shorter, basically we wanted to go to the youth service but some certain people she was with were being over protective and so we didnt have a ride and then finally we got one then ended up at the wrong place then finally got to the right place. The service was at a Church of God in Christ church, I love black people really. They are so much fun. The service was good, they did a couple cool drama/dance things and other stuff. Well a good chunk of the way before it was over, our ride shows back up and i was like guys i dont want to leave and so i will just ride the shuttle back and the guy didnt believe me that my parents would be ok with that so i let him talk to my mom on the phone so she said i could stay and they left. Well after they left, a guy spoke and we worshipped and danced and just had a good time and stuff, and i stood with this girl i had met earlier that night and stuff and we talked some and then 45 minutes later, one of the girls that was with the driver dude came in and was like ummmm he didnt feel comfortable leaving you here by yourself so we waited on you.... ya, that made me pretty mad... cuz #1 i was at a church service with a lot of centennial people, #2 my parents were fine with it, and #3 they made me think they had left... ya. i was not happy to say the least. Then after i got back to the room i talked to Johnny speed on the phone updating him on everything and he updated me on what was going on in good ol Cleveland, or maybe that was a different day. i dunno. anyways So parts of this day were quite frustrating, but parts of it were pretty awesome as well. The good definately outweighed the bad tho so ya.

Friday.
Today i got up late and later in the mornin i realized a had that weird sunburn lookin thing again and i later figured out that i was like allergic to the soap they had there. which was weird cuz i am not allergic to much of anything besides like cats. o well so anyways i got to the convention center at maybe like 10 i guess it was and then i hung out in my dads office and just walked around and ate and did whatever and then went down to help out wiht this luncheon that we were going to later. The luncheon was the Centennial Ministy Team(CMT) and the Fishers. the CMT is basically all the speakers throughout the week and all these well known people so it was cool to be with all them. My family was up at a table at the front and it was pretty interesting to see who all would come and jsut talk to us and its pretty crazy to actually be with all these people at one time. So we had a really good lunch then they honored the memory of my grandpa and then the guy who played like 75f the music in the Passion of the Christ and in other movies, played some cool instrument for us and then Rick Warren spoke on leadership and did awesome. That whole experience was fun but the only downfall was that it was like past 2 when it ended so i was missin lou engles session. but right after that was over, i went to the end of the session which was overly full but we got in (oh the power of a purple lanyard. gets ya anywhere. ha.) So i go in and i caught the last chunk of Lou's thing which was great of course and then heidi baker got up and spoke. She wasnt even scheduled to be there at all but the Lord told her to to come so she flew there for like that day in between flying to diffenent countries ha. she was really awesome and hilarious. then towards the very end of her thing, i saw Lou walkin out so i went ahead and left to cuz i knew he was headed up to my dads office cuz he was doin some interview thing. (my dad was over the media stuff). So once we were up there i got to talk to Lou and I told him hey from Ramp Cleveland and stuff so that was cool.

So a little later, i was txting rachel dotson and she asked what he said and i told her he had basically been like o ya cleveland, theres lots of roots there. and so she was like thats crazy cuz of Jessicas dream so then i was like whoa that is cool. A while back, Jessica Montgomery had had this dream where basically our prayer group was on this hill and we were told to dig down to the roots and then the holy spirit covered the whole hill once we had gotten down and dirty. wow. i just summarized a really long detailed dream in like 1 sentence. amazing. ha. anyways so ya it was cool that he had said roots. i knew he meant heritage, but it was still cool. so i got off the phone and was all excited about it and so i was tellin kay horner, who was like a secretary person about it and she was like Amanda. Look at this. and she pulls out her big ol azusa notebook and opens to the front page and hands me this piece of paper of where they had typed out points of a prophetic word given at a Azusa prayer meeting on Tuesday March 21, that went with that dream really insanely well. so then i was like really freakin out cuz Jesus just likes to continually blow my mind. so heres a copy of that...

The Word of the Lord came saying:
The Lord is doing a foundational work, it is a deep work, not shallow or flitting,
A deep prodding will cause a high flow, bringing new plants, new growth, and new revelation..
Out of the depths will come freshness, it is a freshness that will amaze many, including scholars, historians, and church and denominational leaders.
Movements thought long gone will find a new beginning. It will seem as though a generation has been birthed at once.
Dry, arid places will bloom with new spiritual flowers. Crusted, hard people will become softened.
I will dig beyond the flesh, beyond the carnal, and shallow. To the base, the core, out of this will come new life, new understanding.
Fresh manifestations will come, and even the secular will be amazed. It will be a chain reaction.
People who havent embraced the supernatural will grasp it and be amazed.
Do not mix and mingle that what is of man with that what is of me. Dig into the word
Rejoice at what I Am about to do says the Lord.

This prophetic word was delivered by Bishop Billy Wilson at 8:50 pm on the twenty-first day of March 2006 at the Tuesday night Azusa Street prayer meeting in Cleveland, TN.


Ya pretty amazing. So then i mentioned it to Lou a little later and he was tellin me about Dutch Sheets prophecy over Lee and stuff and i actually knew it better than he did ha but that was cool and then we talked for a sec. and he was sayin how theres definately good and bad roots in Cleveland and stuff. and then later after we had talked, i watched just a tad bit of the service and then talked on the phone and stuff and then later that nite i went down to a youth worship thing but people were comin in and out a lot and it was kinda confusing at what was going on and i ended up havin to leave to catch the shuttle back to the hotel but for what of it was there it was good. Then i went back to the room.

Saturday.
The big day! First thing this mornin, they had Reach LA. It was an outreach thing where Feed the Children brought 30 trucks.

Each of the trucks had 400 boxes in them. Each box helped feed a family for 2 weeks. So ya 12,000 families were helped out. Cool stuff. Today was the day where everyone came together in the sports arena and had a big together again meeting service thingy. It was pretty awesome.


I dont feel like typing a ton about it but if you wanna know what went on, just turn on TBN or Daystar at the right time or go to streamingfaith.com where that service and a lot of the others are achived. But ya it was pretty sweet. And then the youth convocation was awesome as well.
Ron Luce and Jentezen Franklin spoke and a few others. Good stuff.

One of the coolest things was when the whole CMT (centennial ministry team)layed hands on and anointed all the youth.

That was great. We all stood in huge lines and worshipped and prayed and then we would walk through one of the several lines of CMT people then go back to your seat and then just really enter in to the worship that was going on. But what was so cool for me, is that the line i went in, my grandma was in and so i get to her and we just stood there and hugged each other and she was cryin and was sayin i prayed i'd get you. it was a really cool moment cuz the reality of everything both of us i think right then. Cuz it was like whoa. 1.we were standing there in a line where the older generation was laying hands on the younger generation which was one of the main things my grandpa wanted to happen 2.grandpa wasnt there, but he had a much greater view of it all sittin up there with william seymour and all them, and God knows so it was ok. 3. It had been an incredible week. this whole thing had really happened. 4. the laying on of hands thing was about passing mantles which theres tons of stuff about that cuz of what God is revealing to me and others about my Grandpas mantle of spiritual renewal being passed to me... ya its crazy, and we all have questions of what its to look like and thinkin of the whole mantle thing at that moment was a bit overwhelming, God is way bigger than me, thats all i know... So ya all that combined was just really a surreal moment. Anyways and then afterwards we worshipped a while and it was awesome adn the Lord really worked in a lot of peoples lives.

then at the very end we were shoutin about something,(we did a whole lot of shoutin that day) and brooke looked over at me and was like i bet i can shout louder than you and then a little later we were clappin and she said i bet i can clap longer than you so starting then we both clapped non stop for a really long time. it was funny. and then finally after forever, all 4 of our parents attacked us at the same time and pulled our hands apart. so we decided we would have to continue another day haha. then we went back to the room and i got online and stuff and talked for a little bit then packed and only got like 2 hrs of sleep cuz we headed out to go back home at 3am... nice.

So basically the whole week was amazingly incredible. Jesus never ceases to rock my face off and amaze me like all the time. It was awesome to get to be around a whole lot of amazing men and women of God. And it was crazy that I really did get to be like right there and I met so many of them. It was awesome to see tons of denominations all there together in unity. There was so many times where I just kinda stood where was and was like wow. Ya. I love Jesus. He's cool like that.